Stillwater Divorce Lawyer

The other day, I received a phone call regarding a divorce consultation in which the client was very concerned that their spouse had been cheating on them. In the state of Oklahoma, adultery, no matter how significant to the individual, which we understand it very much is, it is not a substantial grounds for divorce. The state is generally a no-fault state, which involved incompatibility arising from irreconcilable differences as the grounds for the divorce that will be filed. The fact that adultery has been committed, as significant and traumatic as that can be to the spouse that is on the receiving end of that adultery, is not a factor in the course of decisions regarding custody, child support, or visitation provided that there are some extenuating circumstances if the child was exposed to any of that. Otherwise, it is a no-fault state, which means the case will be filed as incompatibility arising from irreconcilable differences. There are fault bases available, but those are extenuating circumstances that will have to be discussed on a case-by-case basis, which can be done during a detailed consultation with our office.

Time and time again when we meet with clients, we tell them what they should do and what they should not do during divorce. What they should do is be excellent examples to their children. What they should do is obey the court orders. What they should do is put their children ahead of themselves. When you’re faced with a situation, you can give the spouse a little more time than allowed, sometimes you need to do that to show the court that you’re willing to make the tough decision and put your children’s needs first. If you get in a tit for tat situation with the kids, that looks poorly on both parties. The other pitfalls are if you send text message with angry and derogatory comments, you email bad things to people, or put bad things on your Facebook accounts about the spouse. These things just come back to haunt you.

Do not put anything on social media or texting or emails that you don’t want to have thrown in your face at trial. It will all come back to you, I promise. What makes an experienced divorce attorney upset and frustrated is when we have to spend more time defending our clients’ actions than be their champion. We ask all of our clients to be exemplary in their life, their language, and be appropriate with all your communication with the other spouse.

If you’re watching this video, you may be considering filing for a divorce. In doing so, you need to find an attorney that is the best fit for you and your situation. You need to find someone who’s experienced in divorce law, someone who is familiar with the local jurisdiction, the judges and opposing council where you will be filing for divorce, as well as someone who you can feel you’re comfortable with and trust, because this may be the most stressful and traumatic experience of your life. You need someone who will be able to navigate those rough waters and be able to provide comfort and concise advice during this time of need. In doing so, you need to contact an experienced divorce attorney.

I was meeting with a client the other day regarding divorce action. Her question was, “How much is this going to cost?” It will vary depending on your case. Your case if it’s one that is uncontested will be quicker and it will be cheaper. On the flip side if, it is a highly contested issue, which oftentimes these are since it’s a highly emotional stage of life, and there are children involved, substantial debts and assets, it will cost more money because there will be more thorough work that will be involved. It could involve family law if there are children involved, which another attorney will be appointed to represent the children’s interest. There are also other issues that may come up requiring appraisals of property. Those will require experts that cost more money as a total package for the case. You would need to consult with an experienced divorce attorney in order to determine what your case is likely to cost.

If you’re considering filing for divorce but your spouse resides in another state outside of Oklahoma, can you still file for divorce in Oklahoma? The answer is possibly yes. In Oklahoma, you would need to have resided here for a period of six months prior to filing for divorce. In a period of 30 days prior to filing for divorce, you’d have to reside in the county in which you are filing for divorce. If there are children involved in the divorce, it can become a little bit more complicated. That will need to be assessed on a case-by-case basis where you would come in and speak with an experienced divorce attorney.

Oftentimes the question arises, can I get divorced if I cannot locate my spouse? Under Oklahoma law, there are measures and procedures in place which would allow you to finalize a divorce action even if you cannot find them and serve them personally with a divorce action.What happens is, Oklahoma allows for a publication of the notice of the pending divorce. It must be court approved. It will need to be published in a newspaper in the local county where your case is filed for approximately one day per week for three consecutive weeks. There are some other nuances that may be involved in your case, so you would need to contact an experienced divorce attorney to determine the best course to proceed.

If you’re considering filing for divorce, but you believe you’ve been locked out of certain marital bank accounts by your spouse, then you need to find out what the best options to remedy that situation are. An experienced divorce attorney can help walk you through that process by filing certain motions, and getting in front of the judge.That is a situation that you are entitled under the law to have equal access to. If you are considering locking your spouse out of accounts when a divorce is pending, our advice is to not do that. That will not set the tone well for you. Likewise, if you’ve been locked out of certain marital joint accounts, you need to contact an experienced attorney to help walk you through this process.

Many times, if a party is thinking of filing for divorce, they run into an issue of not having sufficient funds to pay an attorney to file for divorce on their behalf. You may be wondering if you can receive support to file for divorce.In Oklahoma, you can file a request for attorney fees or for suit money to fund your process to hire an attorney and get through the divorce process. You will need to consult with an experienced divorce attorney to determine whether that is an appropriate measure that you can pursue.

If you’re watching this video, you may be contemplating filing for divorce. If you’re considering filing for divorce, the common question that arises is, how do I minimize the cost of divorce? Well, the best way to do that is to be able to come to agreements with your spouse regarding all major issues of divorce, which could be custody of children, debt division, and any support alimony that may be requested.In doing so, you’ll be able to minimize the amount of time the case takes, which will in effect minimize the number of hours that are going to have to be billed by the attorneys working your case. If you have any questions about how to minimize your cost in divorce and how long the process generally takes, contact an experienced divorce attorney.

There’s a time that comes in marriage when you know things are in trouble. You know that divorce is going to be inevitable. The question is, what can you do to get ready? A lot of times there are children involved. A lot of times there’s debt. A lot of times one spouse has the other spouse locked out of all the money.

When you find yourself in these situations, you need to think of a couple of things. One is, how are you going to survive financially with no money? Somehow you have to start preparing for that. Somehow you have to start saving money, or convince your spouse to give you access to money. A lot of spouses control the other spouse with money. You have to worry about how to independently live once you leave the house or the other spouse leaves.The other thing is with child care and child custody, that’s a tough deal. A lot of times you can prepare a little bit by being very devoted to your children and spending a lot of time with them, preparing them for what’s coming. It’s a wakeup call and shocks kids when their parents no longer live together. If you’ve been a parent who’s been aloof, and not spending any time with the children for some time, you need to probably refocus yourself and focus on your children and do what’s in their best interest. It’s tough to put them in the middle of these things, but sometimes they are.

You can spend the time needed to reestablish or establish a stronger bond with your children. Probably the best way to prepare for divorce is contacting an experienced trial lawyer who does divorce trials, who understands the intricacies and all the problems associated with it. By doing that, you can take the time to prepare so you can be proactive instead of reactive. Many times in divorces, we react. If you can take the time to plan, you can be proactive and avoid a lot of problems.

When people start the journey going through divorce, the conduct of each party is really important. Poor conduct could hurt your case. Good conduct can make it a better experience for you. I know that being alone and not belonging to somebody is a strong, powerful feeling, probably the strongest I’ve ever felt. What happens when people are like that, is sometimes they make poor decisions.

They decide they want to go out and have a good time. They want to forget everything. They go out to a bar. They go out and have drinks. One thing leads to another and the weekend or the evening turns into disaster, either from a DUI or a car wreck. They get involved with someone they shouldn’t have been involved with and that creates new problems. It hurts them and their display to the judge about what kind of character and morals and values they have. My counsel to people is, when you’re going through a divorce, remember one thing; everything you do is under a microscope. Every time you do something you need to ask yourself, what will this conduct look like to a neutral third-party person? Will this help me or hurt me? If they don’t know me and if they don’t know anything else about me, what will this conduct say about me?

If you have this attitude and you ask yourself that question, you can avoid a lot of the problems. A lot of times, people don’t follow our counsel. For instance, don’t bring your kids around another significant other during the divorce process. It confuses the children.

Let them have a chance to mourn the loss of their family. Judges look dimly on people that do not consider their children’s feelings. If you don’t know what to do, contact your experienced divorce attorney. He can help you. We take great pride in being accessible to our clients to help them navigate through these tough and difficult decisions. If you have any doubt, don’t do it until you talk to us.

I tell my clients every time they come in, don’t send a text message, don’t put anything on Facebook or Twitter about the divorce unless you want to see it in the courtroom. More often than not, clients will put things on Facebook and send text messages that come back to haunt them. It proves the other side’s case. My recommendation to all my clients is if you’re going through a divorce or a paternity action or a motion of modified custody, these are emotional issues. These are emotional hearings. You do not want to post anything on Facebook.I would go Facebook silent, Twitter silent and only put things in text messages to your spouse or the other parent of your child that you absolutely have to. Do not get mad. Do not post things in haste. Do not say bad things or poor things about the other parent online in any form or fashion. It makes you look foolish, and we spend more time defending you on the things you put on Facebook and social media and text messages than we do being your champion in court. It takes a lot of self-control because this society is so much into social media, but social media only causes you problems in contested family matters.

The other day I received a phone call from a prospective client inquiring about how to start a divorce action. Once you reach that moment in life that you are going to have to file for divorce, it’s imperative that you find an attorney who is experienced in divorce actions. There’s going to be documentation requested of you that will play a factor in any sort of debt and asset division that will be forthcoming in the case as well as any sort of issues with child support or child custody that may exist. It’s very important that at this critical stage in life, you find an attorney that you mesh well with that you believe can lead you through this process confidently and form a bond of trust with you over time. It will be a lengthy process at times, and so it’s imperative that you feel comfortable.

I’m frequently asked about what is important in an uncontested divorce. It’s important to know that it is the cheapest, quickest, and easiest way to get through the divorce process and that would be because both parties know what they’re getting. They’re in agreement as to all issues that are involved in a divorce process. It’s going to depend on whether there are children involved.Do the parties have an agreement as to how they’re going to divide custody, visitation, and whether child support will be ordered, and in what amount? Furthermore, if there are debts and assets that have been acquired during the marriage, have they agreed to how they will be divided? Who will take what property with what debt? If those are all agreed to, it makes the process much more streamlined because a judge is not dealing out who is taking what asset, who is taking what debt, who is getting the children for custody, and who is getting what visitation. In addition, if there are support alimony requests, that could be divided either by a judge or through an agreement. If all issues are agreed to in the divorce process, it will be a much quicker, easier, and predictable process.

I’ve been asked about divorce mediation and whether that’s a requirement in Oklahoma and what that process involves. Divorce mediation is a process where a neutral third-party mediator will oversee the parties and their attorneys at a mediation. Both parties get to air their position as to the issues at hand, whether there’s custody issues, debt and asset division, or support alimony as an issue. Both parties will get to discuss those, and present their issues to the mediator. The mediator will then attempt to reach a mutually agreeable and satisfactory resolution for the parties and their counsel. It is generally required in the state of Oklahoma that the parties attend a mediation prior to the court setting a trial date, the idea being that if the parties can reach an agreement where they both are satisfied with what they’re receiving and what their obligations are, it is better for everyone. You need to contact an experienced divorce attorney to discuss any other concerns you may have about whether mediation will be an appropriate measure for you.

If you’re considering filing for divorce, you may be wondering whether you need to move out of the marital home. It’s generally a better idea if you and your spouse can get along well enough to stay in the marital home until the case can reach a conclusion. If it’s unavailable as an option because there may be some abuse or issues that are toxic to the children if you have children in the marriage, that’s something where you need to get out of the home. We would recommend that you contact an experienced divorce attorney to deal with your fact-by-fact situation. Contact one and determine whether that’s an appropriate move for you.

When you’re going through a divorce in Oklahoma and property and debts need to be divided, the courts look at what’s called an equitable division process. Equitable division is sometimes confused with equal division, which is not the case. The Oklahoma law is very clear that it considers many factors involving the particulars of your divorce case in determining what an equitable division is. You’ll need to contact an experienced divorce attorney to consider those factors that are particular to your case to determine what an equitable division is.

If you or your spouse have filed for divorce and you’re concerned that your spouse may be attempting to hide assets of the marriage, that is something that an experienced divorce attorney can deal with to uncover. What happens is in Oklahoma, the discovery code allows the parties to request certain asset and financial information that is required to be provided by the party under oath under penalty of perjury that this is a true and correct answer. If, in fact, you believe the assets are still being hidden, that you knew them to exist, a forensic accountant will be able to uncover those through this divorce process. You need to contact an experienced attorney to help guide you through this.

A common question when filing for a divorce is, how is inheritance treated in the divorce process? Under Oklahoma law, an inheritance is considered separate property, although there are certain circumstances in which it can become commingled. It can transform into a marital asset if you are providing a pooling or resources, so to speak, with your spouse in purchasing other assets with the inheritance and with marital funds. It’s something that we advise that you keep separate as much as possible if you think a divorce is looming or is already pending. You need to contact an experienced divorce attorney to help you consider whether or not it will be separate property or whether it has potentially become marital property.

The other day I was meeting with a client regarding a perspective divorce. Their question, which comes up frequently, was, how long will this take? In the state of Oklahoma it could be done in approximately a month’s time or less if it’s an agreed matter where both parties are in full agreement as to all issues.If it’s a contested matter where there’s either substantial assets and debts of the marriage or there are children, it could potentially take up to a year or even longer. In this, case it’s something that you want to assess with a competent divorce attorney. Once you assess that with them, they can provide you a more tailored timetable for your specific case.